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You may have already heard the phrase, "we accept what we think we deserve." And that usually ends up being the case. Whether we choose to settle for a partner because we're afraid of never finding the right person, or we accept neglect because we subconsciously believe we deserve it, we may find ourselves in relationships that are not only unsatisfying, but also unhealthy. For a moment, let's put aside the paralyzing fear of being alone forever and drown out the sound of our

Although I love the holiday season and LOVE spending quality time with my family, not everyone does. I understand that the holidays can be tough for anyone, whether it's because of strained relationships or lack thereof. Here are some ways that you can best maneuver the many stressors that can come up when being around family during the holiday season. 1. Evaluate your triggers What are the interactions, statements, questions or behaviors that tend to ignite an adverse emotio

1. They don't hit the snooze button. At night, plan your outfit, to-do list and tasks for the next day. Wake up early. Start your day with positive affirmations and review your goals for the day. Meditate for at least 5 minutes. If possible, exercise in the morning as a way to allow yourself to burn energy all day long. Allow your mornings to be productive and pleasant, not dreary and dreaded. 2. They are purpose-oriented. Set goals for yourself, and methods to keep track of

Being assertive means sticking up for yourself and not wavering on your stance or point of view. Practicing assertiveness is achieved by RESPECTING the other person's viewpoint, regardless of whether or not you agree with it. It is possible to ask for what you want, get a point across, and receive what you deserve WITHOUT being aggressive. Assertive people state their opinions, while continuing to be respectful of others. Passive people don't state their opinions at all. Pass

It is not uncommon to find ourselves in a toxic or unhealthy relationship - whether it be romantic, familial or friendly. Once we become involved or enmeshed in toxicity, we may find it difficult to get ourselves out. I want to emphasize the importance of removing yourself from an unhealthy relationship or environment. It is okay to protect yourself, and detach with love. Here are some ways in which to do so: Personally Focus only on what you can control Rid of expectations D

Each person has a different primary love language. Often, we do not know what ours is, or even what our partner's is. Therefore, we unknowingly act in contrast with our partner's love language, and are unsuccessful in showing him/her love in the way that he/she wants to receive it. This can thus lead to problems in a relationship, sometimes leading to feelings of confusion, resentment, or feeling unloved and unappreciated. When I have clients coming in for couples counseling

Just because you and your partner (or family member, friend, etc.) may have differences in opinions, views or communication style, doesn't mean your interactions have to turn into conflict. Conflict is optional. It occurs when one or both partners attempt to coerce the other into adopting their point of view. Fear underlies conflict. Therefore, when fear and competition become the motivators for the argument, conflict arises. Two simple ways to avoid conflict are to 1) look a